It just goes on and on...
After she spent over 3 weeks in rehab, doing great, making us think 2 days in a row that she was coming home, they tell us they have to operate again. Fine.
They move her to a surgical floor and for some unknown reason, give her a sedative - never a good idea with her. She throws off some weird potassium readings, probably due to a kidney infection, they put her in ICU thinking her kidneys were failing. After 2 days, they decide she has double pneumonia. I sit there for a day watching her and trying to figure out how someone who was doing as well as she was wound up intebated with a feeding tube over a weekend. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that he problem was that they sedated her. I insisted that they the tubes out, which took a day and a half to make sure she didn't really need them, and she seemed fine. She was breathing well, she was starting to understand where she was and what was going on. By this time, it's been 5 days and she can't understand why they didn't fix her ankle while she was out. I'd like to know that, too.
Anyway, at this point she has been in that dirty hospital for almost 7 weeks. I tell one of her doctors that I think she needs to come home for a few days before they operate on her leg again because she has been convinced she's never getting out of there. The way this is playing out is very similar to the way her brother died in November and her sister in March. Psychologically, she needs a break from that place, she needs to be home and Dad and I need a rest from driving all the way over there every day. They made us think she might come home today. We go there - no doctor is around, no one has said anything about her leaving or moving her. We figure nothing will happen until tomorrow so we come home to rest, knowing it's going to be really hard work, especially for me, when she comes home.
10:30 tonight, Dad is asleep and I'm fighting off a troll attack on one of my Wikis. I hear Dad talking, and I know something is wrong. Turns out he's on the phone with Mom, who is extremely agitated and demanding that we come get her. Dad and I trade off talking to her while the other tries to call the hospital. Mom is telling tales of being neglected, no one comes when she calls a nurse, etc. We finally - FINALLY - get a nurse on the phone and they're totally freaked out. They can't calm her down, they're afraid of her, she's threatening to climb over the rails on the bed and crawl home. Believe me, my mom is big and mean and can be impossible to control at times. She's in danger of really hurting herself. I told the nurse to give her some ice chips, which is one of her complaints and will calm her down, and tell her her family is on the way.
I wanted to go and let Dad stay in bed, but he won't have it. He tells me to go back to bed and he'll go to the hospital. I know he's completely freaked out because he forgot his keys and had to call my cell phone so I could let him back in. So my poor father, who is exhausted from this ordeal, takes off through the damned mountains in the middle of the night and I'm here dealing with some asshole who put misogynist slurs and KKK propaganda on a wiki I worked really hard to put together.
I know Mom will calm down when Dad gets there. I'm sitting by the phone in case she calls again before he can get there, since the hospital is nearly an hour away. I don't know what the hell we are going to do. There's so much going wrong with me and my disability that isn't being addressed at all because all we can do is react to the stuff happening with Mom.
I've been trying to distract myself with the blogosphere, but I keep getting into fights with people about f-ing Hillary Clinton. The more people defend her, the more I grow to despise her.
So now what? Do I try to sleep? Do I wait to hear from Dad? Do I keep watching Ethan Hawke butcher my favorite Shakepearean play? I'm too hyper to read. My room is a horrid mess, which is not helping anything.
It's all just. too. much.
Labels: family, Mom